Jill Weatherholt

Writing Stories of Love, Faith and Happy Endings While Enjoying the Journey

SUMMER SPOTLIGHT: LYNETTE D’ARTY-CROSS

100 Comments

Images Courtesy of Lynette D’Arty-Cross

 

Hello everyone! I’m so pleased to be Jill’s guest – I’ve admired her and her blog for a long time now. (And she’s a published author now!)

In blog years, I’ve been around for a long time. I started in October, 2012, but occasionally I’ve taken breaks from it because of work or personal demands.

What’s important is that I’ve always come back to it though. I started my blog as a way of dealing with a very short but very bad marriage to a man who, in my unprofessional opinion, is a full-blown clinical narcissist.  I was completely wrecked by my contact with him, both emotionally and financially.

But getting my thinking out in writing has helped me to clarify what happened to me and how I also bore responsibility for inviting him into my life. The interaction with other bloggers too, their comments and posts, helped me enormously, two of them in particular.  So, I don’t really consider myself to be much of a writer, although I have dabbled in it. For me, blogging is much more about helping me through my thinking, and I always seem turn to it to sort out my thoughts or organise my learning.

The fallout from this relationship is ongoing and I will always have to deal with it, but I have very much moved on to other topics as well.

Landscape photography is one of them, and I’ve included some samples here. I do have a decent camera, but often I find myself taking pictures with my cell phone because the camera is languishing, forgotten, at home.

I’m very fortunate to live in a vast, beautiful land, some of it very conventionally lovely and plump and some of it stark and tight. My home base is the fabulous wine country of the Okanagan Valley in British Columbia, but right now I am in the Northwest Territories, at 60 degrees of latitude and 60 degrees of many other things, too. I am working in a Dene Nation community and am learning about land …

I am hoping that over time my photographs of this place will begin to communicate the character and depth that lives here. But that will take practise and patience.

So, on to Jill’s questions!

Where do you most want to travel and have never been?

  • New Zealand. I would love to visit there and have wanted to go since I was a child. I understand that it is quite spectacular and there’s also some really great wine …

What are some events in my life that have made me who I am?

  • Being married to a narcissist was one. It was a very nasty experience but I have learned intensely from it, mostly about the peoply peopleness of us. Still am.
  • Having been posted to a war zone when I was in the military. When I hear of people trying to come to this country because they are escaping a war, I understand. And those who are opposed to refugee immigration? If they were trying to escape a war, they would want someone to accept them too. Most of the time, people are just people who don’t want to have bombs dropped on them.
  • Having canine friends in my life. I love dogs. Their unconditional acceptance has taught me a lot about how to be a person.
  • Learning to fly a plane. There is a great deal of satisfaction to be had from the precision and discipline of aviation, and I learned as much about myself as I did about how to handle an aircraft.

What was the biggest obstacle I’ve ever had to overcome?

  • There have been many, but probably the greatest one has been dealing with my insecurities. I don’t believe that this aspect of my personality can be changed, but I am aware of them and I work on them all the time. Some manifestations of them are better than they used be: I don’t stutter as much as I used to when I was younger, for instance.

My life is pretty rich, though. I’m married to a man who’s perfect for me. I have good friends and family.  I just got a work promotion, too!

Many thanks to Jill for having me as a guest.

 

Advertisements

Author: Jill Weatherholt

My name is Jill Weatherholt and I’m a writer. I have a full-time job, but at night and on the weekend, I pursue my passion, writing. I write modern stories about love, friendship and forgiveness. I started this blog as a way to share my journey toward publication and to create a community for other new writers. Raised in the Washington, DC area, I’ve lived in Charlotte, North Carolina since 2004. I hold a degree in Psychology from George Mason University and a Certification in Paralegal Studies from Duke University. My first book, SECOND CHANCE ROMANCE, published by Harlequin Love Inspired released on February 21, 2017 and is available on Amazon and Barnes and Noble.com. I was the first place winner in the Dream Quest One Short Story Contest in the Winter 2014-2015 competition. In 2014, I placed second in Southern Writers Magazine Short Story Contest. I was also a top ten finalist in Southern Writers Magazine Short Story Contest in 2012 and 2013. I’m a 2010 and 2012 winner of the NaNoWriMo Contest. I love to connect readers, visit me at jillweatherholt.com

100 thoughts on “SUMMER SPOTLIGHT: LYNETTE D’ARTY-CROSS

  1. Yay. I’m first. I will get my comments down and then stand out of the way. I was very interested in your story Lynette. It is a shame that one person can have such a profound effect on how we view the world. It is good to see you turning what was a negative experience into a positive life. It was a pleasure meeting you and thanks to Jill.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. I love frost on trees and your photo captures this wonderfully!

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Beautiful photos and so nice to meet another blogger. Lynette, you have a lot of creative talent – best to you!

    Liked by 2 people

  4. Hello Lynette, from New Zealand 🙂 It’s a great place and yes the wine is good too 🙂 I am full of admiration for people who overcome – and surviving a narcissist is quite something! I also admire people who do more with their cameras than point and shoot – which is pretty much my style. Your photos here look impressive to me. Congrats on the work promotion 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  5. Good for you ~> keep moving forward.

    Liked by 2 people

  6. Sounds like you have a wealth of experience and circumstances to draw from for your writing. That always enriches our prose, even if sometimes it’s hard to revisit the past.

    Liked by 2 people

  7. I admire your honesty and transparency, Lynette. Putting thoughts and feelings in writing always helps me too, but it’s an especially big step to share those publicly. Good for you.

    Liked by 2 people

  8. Nice to meet you, Lynette. Your photos are gorgeous! You’ve accomplished so much. I’m so glad for you! I hope you’ll get to New Zealand someday. I’d like to visit there too!

    Liked by 2 people

  9. Beautiful photos, Lynette. Narcissists don’t make for ideal partners, that’s for sure. Someone in my family is married to one and it breaks my heart to see how she treats him. I can totally relate to the iPhone photos. Actually they surprisingly do mostly turn out quite well. Great to meet you and happy that you now have such a great marriage partner. 😃

    Liked by 2 people

    • Thank you! 🙂 Yes, I am often surprised at how well the phone pictures can turn out. I am really working now on photography that’s more nuanced and that means that I can’t be such a bubblehead about leaving my camera behind. 🙂

      Someone with Narcissistic Personality Disorder is extremely difficult to live with. I sincerely hope your relative is able at some point to get his life back. In mho, personality disordered people cause a lot of the world’s suffering.

      Liked by 2 people

    • Hi Sylvia! I had a feeling you would enjoy Lynette’s photographs being the excellent photographer yourself. Thanks so much for stopping by today. I hope you have a great weekend!

      Liked by 2 people

  10. Your photography is beautiful! Your story is full of twists and turns but that gives us the best (and sometimes most painful) lessons. Welcome!

    Liked by 2 people

  11. I so enjoy these interviews! I get to meet new people and feel almost as if I live next door to them!

    Liked by 2 people

  12. You have a pretty full life, Lynette. And those photos are stunning. The area you are “stationed” in right now sounds very interesting. I’m glad you managed to escape the horrible periods of the past and are in a happy relationship now. While we don’t have the same past in common, we both do have great husbands, love travel and photography and adore dogs. 🙂 New Zealand is pretty similar to areas in Canada’s by the way.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Thank you very much. 🙂

      It sounds as if you have been to NZ. I have read about/heard from others that there are similarities to Canada. I am so looking forward to seeing it for myself. 🙂

      Liked by 2 people

      • I went there for six weeks as a backpacker when I was 25 and was in awe of the country and its people. Two years ago, and 15 years after my first visit, I went back for two months of which three weeks traveling in a rented camper van. Sorry to say I was less impressed this time. It is very busy with tourists now, life there has become more expensive and – maybe because of the massive influx in tourism, – I find that the people are not as friendly and accommodating anymore. 🙂

        Liked by 2 people

      • That’s always the way, I think. Most good things – once people know about them – start to lose their appeal. My home base is the Okanagan Valley of British Columbia. It is also very touristy (fabulous scenery and great wine), and that is sometimes annoying. Can’t get into a favourite restaurant, congested beaches, too much traffic. But then I remind myself that the tourists have had a lot to do with making the Okanagan what it is. 🙂

        Liked by 2 people

    • It’s great to see you, Liesbet. Yes, you and Lynette do have a great deal in common. Like Lynette’s blog, I love visiting yours, it’s like taking a trip. Your photographs are always lovely. Thanks for stopping by today. Enjoy your weekend!

      Liked by 1 person

  13. Love this post. What a great way to describe land–“plump”!

    Liked by 2 people

  14. Dear Lynette, you are persistent because you say about blogging, “What’s important is that I’ve always come back to it though,” reflecting on your brief breaks.. Two family deaths and clearing out 3 houses (one our own) have required me to do the same in the last few years.

    You have a sense of humor and wisdom. Who else would say “peoply people”? Clever!

    I am glad you have someone special to share your life with now. We celebrated our 50th wedding anniversary in British Columbia earlier this month: Vancouver and Victoria, so pretty this time of year. And – a break from Florida heat.

    Thanks to Jill for featuring such fascinating writers. You bring the writing world much closer!

    Liked by 2 people

    • Thank you very much! 🙂

      I have found it tempting from to time to just not do it. I also had a death in the family and a couple of moves and job changes. For a while, all I could see was the next hill that I needed to climb. The blogging keeps me grounded though, even if I’m just reading others’ posts and not doing many of my own. I often find the commentary to be more valuable than the posts themselves.

      “Peoply people” is probably not my invention – like so much of life, I likely heard it (or something like it) somewhere else. There is a wonderful blogger I follow (https://anupturnedsoul.wordpress.com) who tends to write like that and I may have heard it from her.

      Congratulations on your 50th! Wow! I am very fortunate to have found my M. For me he is perfect and I am grateful for him every day. 🙂

      Liked by 2 people

    • Welcome back, Marian! I know you and Cliff had a great time celebrating 50 years of marriage…congratulations! This series has been so much fun. Thanks for stopping by to meet Lynnette. I loved “peoply people.” I hope you have a great weekend.

      Liked by 2 people

  15. Pingback: Jill Weatherholt’s Summer Spotlight Series | In the Net! - Stories of Life and Narcissistic Survival

  16. So nice to meet you here, Lynette. I lived in the Okanagan (Kelowna) for many years (many of my family members still live there). I now live on Vancouver Island. I agree that blogging is an amazing way to process the experiences that we go through in our lives (especially difficult ones). It is also a great way to meet like-minded, inspirational people. I look forward to reading your blog further.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Hello Donna – nice to meet a neighbour! 🙂

      I also have a lot of family on Vancouver Island. My husband and I are considering Victoria as a retirement option (it’s one of three places we’re thinking about, but we have a few years still to make a decision) and of course it’s so gorgeous – I would be in photography heaven. 🙂

      I look forward to reading yours as well. 🙂

      Liked by 2 people

    • Hi Donna! I’m happy you were able to connect with Lynette today. I know you’ll really enjoy her blog. Thanks so much for stopping by today.

      Liked by 1 person

  17. Hi Lynette. I love taking photos, too, and I can relate to forgetting the good camera. It seems that you were smart enough to make that marriage a short one before any further damage on your psyche. I think most of us have some sort of insecurity. I find they fade as I grow older, other than not liking the sagging skin. ;-P Although, I ever have to do inner checks on those insecurities that sometimes disguise themselves as something else.

    Always nice to learn more about you. Stay warm.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Hi Lori. 🙂 My insecurities are also fading, yes, particularly as I get older. I am still surprised at how they can even now pop up like a giant zit (excuse the metaphor but it seemed apt – pimples AND wrinkles!) Ick. It’s a reminder that you should never get cocky. 😉 I like your wise comment about doing inner checks to make sure that your insecurities aren’t masquerading as something else.

      Yes, the one good thing that I did with respect to that marriage was to get out of it early. I was heartbroken but ecstatic to get my little life back again.

      Leaving the camera behind has been an ongoing issue. Part of it is that it shouldn’t be too exposed to extremes of heat or cold, and we get a lot of both in this country. Oh well, when I need to use my phone, I’ll use my phone. 🙂

      Thanks for your visit – I’m enjoying getting to know you, as well. 🙂

      Liked by 2 people

    • It’s great to see you, Lori. You and Lynette are both excellent photographers. Being the psychology lover that you are, you’ll find Lynette’s blog very intriguing. Have a great weekend!

      Liked by 2 people

  18. Hi Lynette,
    So nice to meet you and hear your story….loved it! Glad you are in a happier place now!
    Waving at Jill…..hope you both have a great weekend and that you are having cooler weather than our hot, humid GA weather! lol
    But it’s a good time to stay inside and read!

    Liked by 2 people

  19. It’s nice to meet you! I love your photography and now you’re making me want to travel to where you are. I’m so glad you were able to find happiness after a negative relationship. We just keep learning and growing and if we’re lucky, we find the beauty in all of it.

    Liked by 2 people

  20. Beautiful photos, Lynette! And I’m a canine lover too! Great to meet you! Happy weekend! Waving to Jill. 😍

    Liked by 1 person

  21. Hi Lynette and Jill! Thank-you for the introduction to Lynette, Jill – I really enjoyed reading about her and am full of admiration for her beautiful photographs!
    Lynette, I so agree with you about the need for refugees to find somewhere safe away from bombs and sniper fire. Most refugees only leave their homes when there is only the choice between flight and death left to them. Most want to return to where they belong and remake their homes. As you say, we never know when we might need a safe haven ourselves.

    Liked by 1 person

  22. Beautiful photographs.
    Life throws some tough punches but it is how we deal with them that really matters.
    Yes, agree entirely about taking refugees in. The extreme case of life challenges – people doing their best just to survive and live another day.

    Peta

    Liked by 1 person

  23. I’m happy that life seems to be working out for you now, Lynette. it must be so exciting to fly a plane. I can’t even drive a car with much success so I’m impressed. 🙂 You live in a beautiful landscape and it must be an immense satisfaction to explore it through photography. It’s nice to meet you.

    Liked by 1 person

  24. I enjoyed “meeting” this writer and tracked down her site so I can follow her. I love that writing is her tool to figure things out, and her photos are gorgeous!

    Liked by 1 person

  25. Lovely photos, Lynette, and a heartfelt post. You are adding beauty to the world. 🙂 I was most struck by your comment about war and understanding the desire to find a peaceful home. It seems timely but sadly is an ageless commentary. Thanks, Jill, for the introduction.

    Liked by 1 person

  26. A pleasure to ‘meet’ Lynette, Jill, and to learn some of her story. An interesting post indeed.

    Liked by 1 person

  27. Your photos DO give me a sense of your beautiful setting, Lynette. And your words show that you’ve shaped yourself into a beauty also. Thanks for being so open and honest here. We all learn from the mistakes in our lives. Turning them into a better way is a blessing.

    Like

  28. What beautiful pictures! Makes me want to walk right into them!
    Thank you for the spotlight, Jill and thank you, Lynette, for sharing!
    Blessings~

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s